Thursday, July 20, 2017

We Will Hold On

It’s almost that time. The time that seemed so far away when you were born. The time we would laugh about as we said “He will only be in third grade when big brother leaves for college”. The time that I’ve tried to prepare you for. The time that I knew would be so exciting yet still so hard not only for me but for you the little brother, the one who will be left behind by the person you look up to the most. The time is among us, I feel it every day and I see it in you almost every day. I see it in your behavior, in your tears, the way you worry and in your jealousy. I make a conscious effort to always remember that you are only 7 years old and you process things differently. You’re hanging on just like us to the only life that you’ve ever known; a life that includes your brother every day and not just occasionally.

The little brother role is hard sometimes and you are more of a little brother than most. Everything will change soon and I am so aware. I am so aware of you. As I watch and help your brother prepare to leave for college I find myself holding on tighter to you. I find myself living each day with you a little differently and it’s because I am so much more aware now of how time truly does fly by. Your brother has proven that and you get to reap the rewards of it by being my second, my last child and my baby. Everything we do together, accomplish and milestone achieved with you is my last as Mom. I am aware, so aware. Every day I have with you amazes me. Everyday I’m aware of your little face full of freckles and every day your voice lingers in my mind as we go our separate ways. I want to embrace and captivate you with everything we do. I want to capture the moments and live each day with you to the fullest because there is no time to waste. Each day with you is another day towards your big exciting adventure that your brother is embarking on now. 

Our time is limited; we have the proof right before us and as we watch him go we will hold on, we will hold on to each other because that’s what we do best you and your Momma.

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